iWrite

Reader with a Stalkish Problem? o_O

Oh, I really need to share this with anyone who loves to read and would listen to me atm.

So the thing is… any time I am at the mall or I am just out and about in general and I see someone with a book I get this sudden urge to just go over to them and strike a book conversation asking them questions ranging from “is it any good?”, “how’s the plot?”, “how’s the writing?”, “should I give it a go?”, “is it worth reading/spending my time on” (because I really don’t have much to spare reading books that would disappoint me), “suggest me some books!!”, and “you have a mighty huge bag of Borders in your hand. Can I just peek in to see what books you have been purchasing?” I have refrained myself from doing the last one twice now because it is a whole new level of creepiness. Once there were these two old men who had full bags of Borders and I just wanted to know what books are they into. The second time was day before yesterday when I saw a guy in Caribou Coffee Bar with this huge book in his hand and a huger Borders bag and he was so engrossed in his book. He was almost done with it and I really wanted to ask, “Do I need this book in my life, bruh?” Thankfully my friend stopped me from doing so – four times. *You are a good friend and I love you*

I am not crazy trust me. I am just very interested in having book related conversation with strangers who would maybe be into a different kind of literature than me and can help me experience it by suggesting some really good books. It was one of my resolutions this year as well. I want to read different genre so I know which ones do I like best because so far I have just no idea.

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Sadly the idea of talking to strangers is still not that acceptable here or I would have spoken to this little girl the other day at the mall, I think she was about 13 or 14, who had a copy of The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones that it is one hell of a read and would ask her to make sure she has the rest of the series in hand because once she ends the first book she will go mad if she doesn’t start the second one right away. Didn’t wanted to creep the kid out so I let her be and calmed the reader in me assuring she will find it on her own, it’s okay.

Tell me guys have any of you fellow readers ever been in such a situation? Please don’t make me feel like I am the only one. I don’t want to believe I am a creep, ha.

Until next time, 🙂

Love,

~F x

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iWrite, Thoughts & Reflections

‘I Feel Like I’m Bothering You’

I had the idea of writing about this blog post from a while now but I was quite reluctant as I am in the beginning of my writing practice and wasn’t sure if my words would be able to convey my feelings well. But I have been asked to write it anyway and see the response instead. So I guess I will just write about it and leave the rest on you all. 🙂

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A few weeks back I met a couple of my friends over coffee. We had been together since school, like grade one till date. Last year we had a rift, and I kind of fell apart from the rest of the group and stayed that way for most of the year until recently. I let go all my anger and went back to being good friends because really how sure are you of life? Do you want to depart on bad terms with the only people you called friends? Anyhow, I wasn’t myself anymore with regards to sharing my feelings or staying in touch. If I was in a bad mood I wouldn’t bother talking. I would listen to everyone and their routines but I wouldn’t share anything of mine, just that I am doing fine and busy with college.

Some time before we planned to meet up, I finally realized I really had no one I shared my inner thoughts with (excluding a few very amazing people). But no one I really hung out or had fun with, someone who knew me through all my layers, and had seen me at my best and worst. I also realized, making new friends wasn’t easy and wasn’t even doing me any good either as it took some time to know them, a lot of time to trust them, or in the end getting to know they talk shit about you, no matter how nice you had been to them.

I tried talking to my close friends openly again. I tried to share my feelings but failed because every time I would want to, I thought I would be disturbing them by my stupid problems. So I just kept quiet. But when we met, and I finally spoke about some ‘things’ (read self made female problems only, of course) that were bothering me, not only did I get to know they feel the same way in their own life but also that I was just normal for thinking such stuff. That day I opened up to them very honestly and we had a great time. In the end I told them that I wasn’t much communicative before because I felt like I would be bothering them unnecessarily. Well, for at least 20 minutes I was abused and yelled at frantically. They all got so pissed that I would even think such a thing. Also, that they share their day-to-day details with me and never think they are bothering me, so if I think I would bother them by sharing my stuff, probably they sharing their details would be bothering me too. I explained how it never did and never would, and in response they explained how me sharing anything never bothers them. In fact they asked me to talk more, no matter how crazy I think I am, and that they miss me talking.

So the moral of the story is, just stop thinking you are bothering your friends with your problems because you are not. What will bother them would be you not sharing anything at all. Your friends know you better than anyone else, so if you’re going to pretend all is okay and think you can get off with it, you are wrong – you won’t. Your friends are always going to be there for you. They have chosen you voluntarily because they like you, your good side as well as bad. That’s the reason God didn’t make you guys siblings. He gave us the chance to choose our own friends. The more you will distance yourself from your friends, the lonelier you will become. Stick with them and they will stick with you till the very end. Everything in life is better if shared with friends, especially sorrows and tough times. : )

I learned my lesson the hard way. I hope none of you have to. This life is too short to quarrel with people whom you can spend time having fun instead.

Have you ever been in such a situation too?! Do share your experience and thoughts in the comments below.

Much Love,

Rebel ❤

PS. Dedicated to all my lovely friends, especially, Annayah, Carter, Crazy Mofo and Dreemers. I love you guys. ❤

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Picture Courtesy: Njm Riz
iWrite

Look What We Got Here ~ Red Cups by Starbucks ❤

A big Hello to you all!! 🙂

Today’s post is about one of my favorite coffee bars – Starbucks.

To begin with, even though it’s not part of my religious festivities, I am a major Christmas fan. I love everything Christmassy; from the tree to decorations, from the cake to the gifts, from color red, green, white and gold to Santa Claus himself – I just love it all. I even have a mini tree I bought when I was in school and I had put it up on Christmas’ eve twice I think. I had bought all the decorations and lights and even a star. My favorite item was an angel with a musical instrument. I don’t know if I have all those decorations anymore because I have been shifting around houses quite a lot in the past years and with every move there was packing and unpacking and more packing and unpacking to do. Guess my stuff is lost somewhere in some cartons or something.

Ever since summer ended this year I have been waiting for red cups to appear in the Starbucks outlet in Muscat. I have literally lost track of times I have questioned all my friends asking them if the cups have arrived yet or not. To be very honest, I was not very hopeful they will come here because I don’t remember seeing them around previously. Or maybe I have been a Second Cup fan for far too long to give much notice to Starbucks.

Yesterday, a friend of mine and I met up in college in the evening to work on our Marketing assignment. We both are grouped together with two more people. The two of us had decided to get done with most of our work by yesterday itself.

We took out the handouts and assignment papers and were engrossed in taking down points to type out and writing a list of things we had to Google. Once done with it we started searching the internet for our topic related information. A while later we realized the college’s IT department has blocked some of the most useful sites as precautionary measures for plagiarism. Boy, we were furious.  It’s not every day that we get serious about working on our assignments. 😛

Now I was hungry and low on energy because of sleep deprivation so we decided to pick something up from McDonald’s to eat and then head to Starbucks for some coffee and to get done with our work as we can get free Wi-Fi there without any blocked websites. Yaay!!

So we went to Starbucks after getting our food, with me eating it all in the car itself, and got greeted by lovely RED CUPS!!! 😀 OHMYGOD!!! My happiness was beyond measures. I was almost giddy with it and excitement. The first thing I did was to rush up to the counter and see them with mesmerized eyes as if I haven’t seen anything so lovely ever in my life, LOL. I am quite sure my friend must have thought I have lost it at seeing some red plastic cups, but oh, the beauty and happiness. Christmas is definitely around the corner now!! Hehe!! 😀

They have introduced two ‘Holiday Delights’; Toffee Nut Latte and Toffee Nut Frappuccino. Same flavor in two opposite temperature drinks, Ahhh. ❤ Coffee has got to be the synonym for love.

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After choosing a spot and dumping my bag and books on the table I went and ordered myself a small Toffee Nut Latte. I always go for either mochas or frappuccinos so this time I wanted to try a latte. And to be honest, it was one of the best I have ever had. I am not a fan of very sweet drinks anymore or toffee flavor, but this was an amazing taste of mild sweetness and wasn’t too heavy on the taste buds. I totally loved it and would recommend it to every single person I know and whoever reads this. I want to go back again and try Toffee Nut Frappuccino now.

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Another very important thing to add here, I finally discovered Starbucks’ official website for the Middle East. Hahaha! I was very happy with myself on finally finding it. And while I was at it, I couldn’t help seeing their header and copy it to add here, hehe.

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Have you tried any of the two Holiday Delights yet?! Which one is your favorite?

Much Love!! ❤

iWrite

How I Met Myself (Very Much Related to How I Met Your Mother)

Lately I have been watching How I Met Your Mother. Yes, from the very start. I used to like this show since it came on TV, and though I know I saw it later than it hit the tubes for the first time, but that’s how it is on my desert, you see the best things when they are almost over.

I remember watching the first season years before and totally loving Ted. He was just so adorable and madly in love with Robin. I was young and thought that was so freaking cute. Especially when he made it RAIN!! Oh yeah, the rain dance!! How can we possibly ever forget that!! HOW CUTE CAN LOVE GET!! *excited love struck gestures of a teenage version of me*

Yeah, I don’t think like that anymore. I have become a pessimist now. (Just kidding) (Of course I am NOT!!!! *shrieked in Robin’s usual talking manner with Patrice*)

Okay, so this summer I downloaded the complete HIMYM series, season one to eight. Now boy was I excited. Haha!

I remembered most of the first season still (wow, that’s a new), so it was more like I was skipping through most of the mushy, romantic stuff. Then came season two and so on. I was enjoying it so much that I stopped watching it once I was done with season six. I mean, I just didn’t want it to end, it was so amazing. But then I got bored of my life and got back to the show.

The first two seasons, I was into Marshal and Lilly, more than Ted. They were the only couple and were totally cute and crazy together. Not really ashamed to admit, but I didn’t really have any attention on Barney. Even though before downloading the show, my friend Mana, more like warned me he is hard to miss and very influential. I am such an exception, I tell you people.

Third season, I started noticing Barney.

Fourth season, MORE.

Fifth season, I was DEAD on Barney.

People who have seen the show must know whyyy season fifth would have such an effect. The first five episodes were my most favorites. I LOVED them!! Whenever in future I will watch HIMYM again, I am pretty sure that’s where I’ll start from. Yes, I ship Barney with someone SO BAD. Then came season sixth, seventh and eighth, and I cried my eyeballs out on season eighth episode eleven and twelve. :’) Tears of joy ❤

Now, something really stupid happened while I was on my HIMYM series conquest. Okay, I shouldn’t dub it that way because most of us go through it, you know, looking at some fictional character and realizing how similar you two are. THIS IS NORMAL GUYS. Of course dramas, movies and books are written based on normal beings itself. It is just that they are more exaggerated and with happy endings. Dude, I am in my early twenties, I know such stuff does not exist for most of us normal people. -_- Like I mentioned earlier, I have become a pessimist.

Anyway, so while watching How I Met Your Mother, just imagine who I realized I was more like. What do I hear?

Lilly? – Ah, naaww!! *passing a foxy smile and shrugging a hand in the air*

Probably Marshal then – Oh guys, com’n no! *doing Marshal’s crazy inner goddess gestures*

Robin? – I WISH!! *aiming and shooting a cardboard head with accuracy, without flinching, in fact with a triumph smile*

Barney?! – Haha, No. *wait-for-it*

 

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Must be Scooter – Who are you kidding?! *hair tied up under a cap and working at Lilly’s school canteen still*

(If you haven’t seen the show you probably have noooooo idea what I am doing or talking about here)

This leaves us with just ONE person, one person I so dread to say I am like.

*Drum rolls*

Barney: Have you met TED?!

YES, TED MOSBY – THE SCHMOSBY. -_-

 

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Yes, he is cute and adorable and a ray of sunshine and hope and STUFF. But he is also almost everything wrong and I so wish I wasn’t. In the start I used to think I am more like Robin mentality wise but to my disappointment I was wrong.

Ted and my similarities:

1-      He is a romantic. (Let’s not even go there! I am just going to pretend I never wrote this)

2-      He believes in destiny. (Are you serious, dude? – Yes I am -_-)

3-      He is impulsive. (Big time!)

4-      He takes life too seriously. (Everything has a deep meaning – No, it doesn’t, bitch! -_-)

5-      He has a set goal for every phase of life, which he never achieves, because he has somewhat forgotten about it. (I forget about everything. It won’t be much of a surprise when I forget how to eat too someday)

6-      He falls in love too quickly. (Have you ever seen my list of crushes?! Let me make it easy for you – ASK MY MUM!)

7-      He is too caring for his own good. (No comments.)

8-      He can’t let go – of anything – and I literally mean anything, not just people but non living things too.

9-      He doesn’t take relationships slow. He just dives into them and wants to get to the end part first even before reaching the first quarter of the relationship. By end part I mean, saying I love you, marriage, kids, etc. He wants and plans for it all even before knowing a person well enough. He doesn’t even bother asking them if they are ready for such commitments. (Kill me, no please – DO IT!!! *Lilly’s he-is-dead-to-me voice*)

 

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10-   He thinks he is super cool, whereas he is a dork, a BIG one. (I am a challenge-accepted amount of a  dork -_-)

11-   He is socially awkward. I score higher than him here. I top up by being anti-social as well.

12-   He is the worst advisor. (Don’t even think of coming to me regarding any advice. I will ruin your life.)

13-   He doesn’t really have many friends, but he would lay his life for his four besties. 🙂 (The ONLY good thing about Ted)

It was already bad enough in my head, but now that our similarities is in a list right in front of me in a more physical form where I can read and reread it, I feel like I should indeed shoot myself. 😀

Now of course Ted is going to mature up a little bit, like we saw in season eight, but he is still a dork. There is only one thing we can truly be happy about regarding him; at least he is going to get his better half by the end of season nine. *Yaaay!!*

As for me, I don’t stand a chance with either Jamie Campbell Bower or Harry Styles. (Fan girl much?)

My today’s Lipton Green Tea feel-good tip: Enjoy feeling fabulous today. (You bet I will! -_-)

iWrite

Why Do I Read..?!

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Have you ever felt like if you put down a book and stop reading for a while, your whole world will come crashing down?!

Do you ever get the feeling that the only thing holding you to your normal state is your books in which you bore yourself day and night just to skip past your reality?!

Or do you ever feel like just sitting in a place and arguing with yourself that you are just going to waste your time sitting idle so it is better to hold a book and read it cover to cover?!

I have felt almost every single one of those emotions.

Ever since this year started I got back to reading books. I don’t remember when was the last time I read a book with passion or such eagerness like I am doing now.

I can recall reading a book previously; more like savoring it’s every single page, word by word. But now all I can see or feel is me in a rush to end the book as quickly as I can and start another one right away. I do not stop for anything. All I want to do is just read, read, and read, no matter what.

Reading has become so important and such an integral part to me that even if I am sitting idle for a second or browsing the internet I feel like I am wasting my precious time which can be well spent on reading a book instead.

I don’t know the reason as to why I feel this way but I do feel like if I ever stop reading my world will collapse the very instant. I believe it is better to lose myself into a world that doesn’t exist but is at least an immense source of comfort.

I think if I don’t, all the lies and make beliefs I tell myself to keep going from one day to another will reveal their selves, and confront me telling how my reality is nothing but a bunch of fake scenarios I keep making in my head to survive these long days and even longer nights. It might disclose to me about how everything I hold dear is just a hoax, and it is time to let go of it, for my own good.

But maybe I am not strong enough to do it, to let go, not right now, and maybe never.

I can’t stop reading because I am not prepared to face my own actualities. I am too afraid to deal with my own lies.

iWrite

Why Write?!

The reason why people like me need to write is so that we can put our minds at ease. We tend to live too many realities and lives parallel to our real existence and hence are bound to lose ourselves in them. This leads to us not being able to distinguish between the real one and the one we had imagined in our head or lived for someone else.

For people like me, writing is a therapy. To set aside what had been done, what we have been through or simply felt, so that it does not come back haunting us when we don’t have our guards up and take us back to the moment we are trying to forget. Or best trying to put in a picture of words so that we can let that piece rest in peace in some corner of our mind where we don’t have to visit it as often as our unconscious mind is making us to.

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iWrite

Nothingness

After the last heart break,

She locked her heart so tight,

And threw the key so far,

That now when she wants to retrieve it,

To breathe again,

She cannot find it.

She has lost the key to her heart…

She has lost herself…

And she will soon die,

Suffocate with nothingness…

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